How To Ask Someone to be a Reference for You

Summer time usually means students have more time because they don’t have classes in the summer or they’ve just graduated and are now starting to look for full time positions. Continuing students may be looking for a summer job or might be applying for internships, externships, field schools, or other opportunities. An important part of the application process for any of these possibilities is the reference. You might not have asked anyone to write one for you since you applied to university, so you might feel a little anxious about doing so. I’m here to help calm your nerves and help you set yourself up for success in requesting a reference for whatever opportunity you want to pursue.

Choose the right person for a reference

Select someone who knows you well and can speak positively about your skills, abilities, and character. Ideally, choose someone who has worked closely with you or supervised your work. Consider individuals who can provide relevant and credible insights to support your application. Reach out to them directly and personalize your message. Explain why you believe they would provide an effective referral and why their perspective is valuable. Express your gratitude and make it clear that their participation is entirely voluntary. Respect their decision if they decline, as they may have valid reasons or limitations.

Provide useful information

Highlight specific experiences or qualities you would like them to discuss to ensure they have a clear understanding of your expectations. Make it easy for them by providing them with relevant information about the role or opportunity you are applying for. Share your updated CV, a brief summary of your experiences and accomplishments, and any specific points you would like them to address. This information will help them tailor their statements to highlight your strengths in relation to the opportunity. It’s also frequently helpful to give them a brief reminder of what class they had you in (and when) if they are a lecturer or tutor.

Make it clear what the referrer needs to do

You will be expected to provide contact information for your reference. This is usually their email address and phone number. It’s best to ask ahead of time what the best email and phone number are for them. If they will receive an email that they need to respond to, let them know. If they need to write a letter and submit it to a website or email it to a specific email address, let them know. It can also be helpful to make it clear what deadline (if any) there is for providing the referral statement.

Give as much advance notice as possible

Be aware that nobody gets paid for serving as a reference for you. They must take time out of their day and work in order to put together the reference for you. The more time you give them, the better job they are able to do. Also remember that just because you’re in a rush to complete something, doesn’t mean they’ll want to be in a rush to do so. My best advice is to try to give at least two weeks of notice if possible. If you’re not able to do this, be up front about the short notice and make it clear that you understand this is an additional imposition on them and you will understand if they are not able to work within that timeframe.

Follow up with a thank you

You should say thank you immediately when your potential reference agrees to be a reference for you. You should also send an additional thank you email (or handwritten note if you want to be super professional about it) after they have completed the task. This is an important part of maintaining a positive relationship with a person you will likely want to ask to serve as a reference for you again in the future.

Example for asking someone to be a reference

When I was applying to postdoctoral research positions I had a few people I reached out to who agreed to serve as references for me. For some people, I asked them each time if they would agree to serve as a reference. For others, I asked if it was okay to use them as a reference for multiple applications and just provide them the necessary details each time I shared their details. Some people prefer the former method, while others are fine with the latter.

Each time I emailed someone who agreed to serve as a reference for me, I provided the following information:

• A PDF of the job description I was applying for

• A copy of the CV and cover letter I was using for that specific job

In addition to that, the subject line tended to indicate it was a reference request, whether any action was needed, and the name of the employer (or in this case, university or research group) I was applying to.

For example: Reference Request – University of Edinburgh – Action Required

Then in the body of the email, I let them know exactly what actions are required, what information they’ll need to complete them (the relevant email address or website address to submit the reference), and the deadline for providing the reference.

Wrap Up

I hope this blog post has helped you plan how to ask someone to serve as a reference for you and removed some of the anxiety and mystery from the process for you. If you have any questions that relate to this topic, feel free to ask them in the comments below and we’ll be sure to address them. 

Written by Carly McNamara